AB-Elevation

As parents we often times “bite the bullet” and ignore our inner voice that tells us to slow down. With the constant demanding of our time, our energy and our services, we fail to take a moment to breathe and take a time our for ourselves. Nevertheless, our continued ignoring can eventually cause mental, emotional and physical melt down. Feeling like I was at the peak of my life physically, I pushed myself to manage my different roles. Being the classroom mom for my teenage son, the school tutor for my younger sons school, and the parent advocate for my girls school all while I was in school trying to complete my own degree. I was literally running to four different schools, trying to maintain four different roles at each school and still uphold my role as a wife, mom, and bring in any side money with my new business and any other part time jobs I could get. Yes, my children were doing well in school, I maintained my grades, I was somehow managing to see my husband which was rarely, and I was making small progress with my business venture; it seemed as if my social life was obsolete and my prayer life was depleted. All the while, I was constantly feel an overwhelming heavy burden that laid on my chest ALL THE TIME. I was popping pills (Antacids) in order to relieve the pain. I would feel constricted and trapped all of the time and hated closed spaces. I never felt these issues before and a matter of fact I prided myself on not taking medicine because of my health. It got so bad that I found myself taking a pill in the morning and one at night just to be “proactive” and avoid the pain. Still “biting the bullet” I went about my regular schedule. This particular day, during finals week, I found myself running out of class because I could not breathe. I felt trapped, tight chested and closed in.  At this point, I knew I needed help.I immediately made an appointment to see the doctor. I thought, Oh my goodness, am I having a heart attack. I thought, “What would happen to my kids, who would care for my family, my husband would be alone! All these thoughts rushed through my mind. However, once I went to the doctor, I found out that I was having panic attacks. I was happy to find out it was not the worst, yet, relieved it was just this. I knew right then and there what I needed to do. I begin to refocus and found my source of peace again. I started to pray and ask God for direction. I asked God to help me to balance my life, relieve the stress and put my trust in Him. With God, exercise, like riding my bike (actually my sons bike), making time to exercise with my husband, spending time to journaling which was so releasing and most importantly realizing that I could not do everything and to some things I must say NO!,With all my responsibilities, it sometimes still becomes overwhelming to think about slowing down. You constantly think about what will be left unattended. With God, my family, my friends, saying NO and having full reliance on God -  I prioritize and pray my way through each and every part of my life, put my health first and realize Rome was not built in a day!